Life is not a race!
Once Chinese philosopher Chuaang-Ju was catching fish near a river bank. A messenger of the king appeared suddenly and told him about the king`s desire to appoint him as the Prime Minister. Chuaang told the messenger:” I have heard that the king has a shield of a divine tortoise in his museum. Suppose the tortoise becomes alive. Would it in that case like to reside in the museum or would prefer to return to the morass where he was originally born? The representative replied: “He would have liked to return to the morass.” Chuaang-Ju replied: “I too would like the same. Men loose peace of mind after getting power. Sometimes they even lose their lives. “Please tell the king that I too would like to return to the morass”. Happiness is never achieved by running after money and power.
Most of the problems we confront in our day to day life are our own creation. How? Because we are mostly busy in comparing ourselves with others. He has a bigger house. His children are much well placed. His company is making lot of profits. I am not progressing like someone else. My position is superior to others. All these comparisons with others create lot of pressure in our mind. Instead of keeping our minds engaged in such negativities, we can show mercy to ourselves by engaging constructively. It does not mean that we should not try to progress and remain satisfied with our achievements but we should avoid comparison with the achievements of others.
Everybody has its own achievements. Problem arises when we start comparing ourselves with others. Someone is in politics for thirty years. Naturally, he would have grown enough in his own line and became MP, MLA or even Minister. Someone else is in the Government job. He would grow in his own cadre and according to his own seniority. Like that. At the end of the day, you cannot and should not say that you could not rise like your neighbour, or relative or friend for that matter. Actually speaking, we can relish life much better by developing an art of oneness and a sense of integration with the aspirations and achievements of others. If we remain confined to our own self and keep envying with others, we can never live a happy and satisfied life.
Life is not a race. We have come here to live our own lives in our own style and according to our nature. Of course, we cannot exercise our right to live independently without any full stop. There has to be limitations so that there are opportunities for others to live happily. Life is also not meant to mint money. Had it been so, God would have made us adult right way so that we start earning immediately after we come to this world. But there is childhood, then at the end the old age. In between we become young, then middle aged and so on. Thus, requirements of body and mind keep changing. Unfortunately, we sometimes fail to synchronize ourselves with this change. This results in avoidable disappointments.
One of the greatest problem being faced by humanity these days, is trust deficit. We are unable to confide in even with our nears and dears. We cannot share our mental burden with our neighbourhood. We do not mix with our co-workers. The result is- increased number of people are committing suicide. The number of persons with depression is growing tremendously.
Most of the people commit suicide due to self-created isolation. The keep themselves confined. The result is that they are often overpowered by the negativities. It is not possible nor desirable to share and discuss once everything with everybody but the issues which are making our lives miserable need to be shared with the people whom we trust. But the problem is you cannot create trustworthy friendship overnight.
I remember one incident when a friend of mine was immensely upset over some office problem. Luckily, I met with him during morning walk in Lodhi Garden. He did not look normal. He was not answering my queries properly. I understood, all was not well with him. I tried to involve him in talk. He opened up gradually and told me that he was intending to commit suicide because of great injustice done to him by the Department in denying him the promotion which was due. I had a lengthy discussion. I tried to dissuade him from worrying too much about things which were not in our control. He seemed better. Next day he met me again and thanked a lot for healthy discussion but for which he could have gone to any extent ,even committing suicide. The purpose of narrating this incident here is to make the reader aware about the importance of sharing things with nears and dears.
Many people remain worrying throughout. There could not by anything worse than this. I have myself been a great sufferer due to this habit. Actually, worry does not bring any solution rather it maximizes the problems by creating new problems mainly because we often hurt people, may be unwillingly in such state of mind.
Worry keeps you mentally involved. You lose lot of mental energy in meaningless things. That time and energy could have been better utilized in finding new friends, reading new books or gossiping with friends of positive thinking which could have brought out new light in our lives. If we are in trouble, the answer is not to get engrossed in it rather to remain peaceful and concentrate upon the possible solutions.
We all have to struggle throughout the day to earn livelihood. At the end of the day we come back to our home. Many times, there is a jam on the road. We have to wait for hours to reach our destination. By the time we reach our house, we are tired. We definitely need something to unwind ourselves. It can be a hot cup of tea brought by your wife or smiling children or a smiling aged parent who kept waiting for hours for their children to return.
Sometimes we get irritated even with the slightest inconvenience. We start shouting at others. He also reacts accordingly. Things get out of hand soon. Many people suffer heavily in such situations. The question is: “why such things happen”? Why people are so much irritated even at small happenings in day to life?
The newspapers are flooded with the reports of violence caused without much justification. Someone bringing his scooter in front of a running car, gets violent for nothing. He strikes against the glass and breaks open it. The driver inside the car also speaks something. Both get out of control and start beating each other with the result that both are seriously injured and one of them dies on way to the hospital. Such incidents are daily reported in the newspapers/televisions. But the question is: why such things are happening? Can we stop such violent behaviour?
Over expectations from others is also often cause of tension. Besides mutual relationship too is adversely affected. We are not bothered about the problems of others and put our interest above everything. This often leads to conflict of interest. We should not do something which we do not want others to do with me. Suppose someone asks me to help him get a job, or to give a loan of hefty amount without even considering whether it is within my means. Then we may often have to face frustration. Because the expectations which are not rational and are without proper consideration often get rejected and ultimately result in disappointments.
Most of the people are running after money. To them material achievements is everything. They want power. They want high position. They want to be well known. But at what cost? Even when you have already gained these things, your cravings are not over. You want something more. This something more has created an endless struggle within. People are fighting with themselves. They are on constant war with their own self. The question is: why??
Negative thinking is our worst enemy. We keep worrying about the future. This does not help in anyway. It spoils our mental and physical health. It adversely affects our capacity to take on the ups and downs of life. Once we are able to come out of it, we can go much beyond our imagination. There are infinite possibilities. We are here to achieve. But that needs a positive mind.
Problems that we confront in our everyday life is our own creation and we alone can solve them. Making others responsible for our own failures is a human weakness. We assign all good achievements to our own credit and fix responsibilities for our failures on others. That never can bring peace and harmony in our lives. We have to develop the art of acceptance. All good and bad things that happen in course of our lives should not be allowed to dominate us. We cannot control others. We cannot decide about many things that happen in our lives but we can certainly control ourselves and decide how to react. If you can do this, we will be opening the door to perfect peace of mind.
Peace of mind is the greatest asset which we can possess costs nothing but it cannot be bought . It can only be practised.”Ashantasya kuto sukham”?Lord Krishna repeatedly stressed upon the need to renounce attachment but not the world so that one can live in peace with himself and with the world outside. This world is nothing but reflection of our own mind.”Yas munde tas brahmande”that means we see outside only things which are already in our mind. If we constantly think ill about a person, we are bound to treat him accordingly. Naturally, he too would react in the same fashion. Thus, a chain reaction starts. We just keep on reacting. This never gives peace of mind. We have to act and to stop reacting to the developments in order that we are able to live a contended and satisfied life!